How to Feel Absolutely Beautiful
Ready to feel attractive again? Or maybe you’ve never felt beautiful and want to give it a try. Here are my 9 favorite tips on how to feel beautiful inside and out.
Have you ever wondered how to feel absolutely beautiful? For a long time I never even imagined that I could. Yet, a few years ago, I decided to make myself feel beautiful and to my surprise I began to believe it as a result.
For the first time in my life; I’m truly comfortable with my looks and it feels wonderful. Here’s how to feel absolutely beautiful too.
Learning to Feel Beautiful Did Not Come Naturally!
As a teenager, I never felt pretty. (Picture at the end of post) In fact, I usually felt the opposite. Miserable does not even come close to describing how I felt about my looks. Even as late as my early thirties, I felt ugly. I can remember telling a counselor that I hated people looking at me because I felt so ugly.
Looking back on pictures, I wasn’t quite as horrible as I felt at the time.
But here’s the thing. If we feel ugly on the inside, it’s impossible to feel good on the inside. To be attractive, we have to feel beautiful inside and out.
As a women, we’ve been judged on our looks since the day we was born. And even worse we judge ourselves based on magazine and social media images that are impossible to live up to. How can I feel beautiful when I can’t measure up to all the images I see all the time?
However, that judgment can end when you become comfortable in your own skin and with your own looks. You can feel beautiful first and then everyone else will believe it too.
Learning how to feel absolutely beautiful is about taking what you already have and pouring a whole bunch of self-love and care into your own body and life.
Become Beautiful by Taking Care of Yourself
Spending time and money on ourselves is often difficult. I can’t tell you all the times I see women who are dressed frumpy with messy hair walking around with little girls dressed like princesses. (Guilty back in the day!)
Everyone seems to be busy these days and it can definitely be difficult to make time for yourself. Yet, it’s important. Not because of someone else’s idea of beauty but because, you were born to be beautiful.
There are no rewards for wearing yourself out and giving up on your body or your beauty. You end up sick and tired and not feeling a bit beautiful.
Here’s a secret. When you put yourself first, the people in your life will honor you too. You have to set the standard for giving yourself the time to be beautiful because no one else is going to do it for you.
(For tips on How to Look Great in Any Situation, click HERE.)
Now, before you begin rolling your eyes, I am not talking about spending hours in front of a mirror applying tons of make-up or never-ending shopping. I am talking about basic self-care that when used will make you feel beautiful.
Decide to Be Beautiful
This might sound weird but I had to decide at some point to become a beautiful woman. I had never felt it because of those awkward teenage years and because I was married for 30 years to a man that never told me I was.
For someone like me—I had to DECIDE that I was beautiful before it happened. This was intimidating because I thought, “Who am I to think I could be beautiful?”
Like everything else I do, I started with small incremental steps. I took better care of my appearance. I began spending money on things to make me beautiful. (Super scary and went against so many things in my upbringing.)
One thing I did to work with my subconscious, was to create a music play list that I listened to every time I went for a walk, several times a week. At the end of the post, I’ll share my personal playlist that really did help me feel beautiful.
Being beautiful does take time, effort, attitude, and a belief it is possible.
BEAUTY IS FREE and it really is available to everyone.
How to Feel Absolutely Beautiful with Nutrition
I have to start with nutrition because I believe that the nutrition of women is reaching a crisis. Our diets that are full of sugar and processed foods are destroying our health and beauty.
While you may know that food has an affect on your weight, most people are oblivious to its effects on your skin.
You can look around and see the shape people are in. Even when women manage to remain thin, they have poor skin tone, wrinkles, and worst of all, many are facing serious health challenges at really young ages now.
Sugar Can Affect Your Beauty
I first became aware of sugar as not being good for me when I was pregnant with my third child. At that time, I began removing much sugar from my diet. Many years later, I got really serious about not eating any sugar or foods that act like sugar in my body.
At about the same time, I began consciously eating healthy types of fat in larger quantities than any diet had ever allowed.
And my face loved it. My skin cleared up and my color was better than ever. Best skin of my life! (How to Look Younger Naturally)
What you eat makes a difference. When I eat better, of course I feel better. For this post, I’m going to concentrate on two things that show up in my skin. Since our skin is our largest organ, when it looks good, we naturally feel more beautiful.
There are two things that I believe create great skin: avoiding sugar and processed foods that act like sugar in the body and adding healthy fats into your diet.
At fifty-five, I don’t have any wrinkles and my skin is fairly tight and filled out on my face. I’ve never used Botox, fillers, or even done professional facials. What I do though is watch what I eat.
When I eat too much sugar or processed foods; the first place I can tell is in my face. My skin starts looking dull and pasty.
Fats Help You Look Beautiful Naturally
I also eat a lot of healthy fats. Dietary fat does not cause a person to get fat. There are lots of reasons people do get fat—but eating healthy dietary fat is not one of them. I am seeing now, many women of my age or younger, who are thin but have lots of wrinkles and look years older than their age.
I blame low-fat diets for the breakdown of the skin. Too many processed foods that increase inflammation and lack of healthy dietary fat are not good for looking beautiful.
All that sugar and foods that act like sugar create inflammation and a breakdown of the things in your body that make skin look great. Even foods we think are “healthy” can be bad for our bodies and beauty.
The Truth About Fat
If you’ve ever been on a diet; you’ve heard that you shouldn’t use more than a tsp of oil on your salad. I remember being on Weight Watchers year ago and being told to use 2 tsp of oil. It seemed like so much and in the forums women were complaining that they couldn’t make themselves eat that much oil!
Those days are long gone for me. As long as I’m eating real food; I don’t worry about eating too much oil. I know it doesn’t make me fat and it’s not clogging my arteries. (Sugar is the secret villain in both of those things!)
In reading about fat over the years and from my own experience; I realize that healthy fats are the secret to losing weight, maintaining a healthy weight, and for having great skin. They are protective and good for us.
That’s right, healthy fats are an important nutrient!
I wrote about healthy fats here but in a nutshell, they are part of foods such as avocados, nuts, eggs, and certain meats as well as oils like coconut or olive. Canola, vegetable, and seed oils are not good for your body or skin.
Curious about 60 years of the real research behind low fat diets? This book is amazing! The Big Fat Surprise
How to Feel Absolutely Beautiful with Exercise
I’m not telling you anything new by recommending exercise. Where I do differ from most things you read is that I don’t think you have to get all crazy to get fit.
I look and feel best when I move most days of the week and especially if some of those days are outside walking or riding a bike. Moving feels great!
Most days, I do shorter workouts for 20 to 30 minutes in my home. Two or three days a week I like to do something longer such as taking a walk.
As much as I like the benefits for stabilizing my weight; I love how it makes me feel. I’m sure that it’s doing good things for me inside too.
Exercising creates a feeling of strength and balance that are very attractive as well as improving the functioning of pretty much everything in your body. I like exercise that relaxes as well as strengthens.
How to Be Beautiful from the Inside Out
Being beautiful starts inside. It starts inside with your attitude but you can also do a few physical things immediately to make yourself more attractive.
To put out a beautiful vibe, you have to use your posture, eyes, and smile.
Remember teenage miserable Sara. It’s probably going to come as no surprise that she was quite slouchy too. Over and over my mom would have to remind me to straighten up my back. She was worried about my posture of course. But I’m also sure it just wasn’t that attractive to see me all hunched over.
I still have to remind myself to straighten up. And I do because I believe filling out your full posture and taking your place in a room is attractive!
When I enter a room, I remind myself to breathe and to straighten up. I let my breath fill out my body and the resulting energy to straighten me up. Instead of just trying to straighten my back, I think of positive healthy energy filling up my entire body. So, I guess I’m straightening up and out and filling out my space from the top of my head, out my fingers, and all the way to my feet.
Don’t Have a Bitchy Resting Face
Then I put my attention on my mouth. If I feel some tension, I release it. I try to keep a gentle smile on my face. If I don’t do this, I’d probably have what some people call a “bitchy resting face.” I know people that swear they can’t help it. I believe you can.
Once, I had a client who kept getting job interviews but couldn’t land the job. She called me because she was desperate to get a job. The minute I walked into the waiting room to meet her I could see the problem. She definitely had a “bitchy resting face.” She looked mean and unhappy.
Well, she was unhappy to be unemployed but she wasn’t generally unhappy. I recommended that she practice smiling—all the time. Every single time she passed a mirror, she was to smile. Any person she met or came across, she was to smile.
A week later, I almost didn’t recognize her. She looked amazing. And within a few weeks, she landed a great job that was in line with her qualifications.
Learn to Smile With Your Eyes
There used to be a show called America’s Top Model and Tyra, the host , would tell the models to “smize.”
In short, it’s smiling with your eyes. Most communication is nonverbal and your eyes are powerful assets to your beauty. Not just because of their physical attributes but because they express your attitude, your interest, and I think, they express your general energy.
How to Feel Absolutely Beautiful with Passion
While my fiancée often tells me I’m beautiful, he tells me that I am at my most beautiful when I am talking about something I’m passionate about. Often he say that he loves listening to the subjects I love best because it animates me in a way nothing else does.
For me those things are my current job, my granddaughters, and my blog. I am 100% sure none of those would be interesting to him at all if I wasn’t lovingly passionate about them.
Each day is something to look forward to when we have things we are passionate about. Passions give us an energy and vitality that no make-up can give us.
What if you don’t feel passionate about anything? Then it’s time to start exploring things. All my current passions are relatively new. I had no idea a couple of years ago that I would fall in love with a job and with a blog. No idea! Yet, in the process of trying new things, I stumbled into two things that light me up with passion.
Having interests and passions makes us beautiful! Being beautiful isn’t just about physical features, it’s about having an inner light that shines from within.
How to Feel Absolutely Beautiful with Love
A while back, I met a young woman. She talked in a mono-tone and seemed to have no energy or particular personality. She seemed nice enough but conversation with her was difficult.
I ran into her last week and we began our conversation and it was difficult as usual. Then I casually asked her about some upcoming plans. All of the sudden, this woman turned beautiful right in front of my eyes!
Needless to say, I was fascinated and curious to know why. Turns out, she had gotten herself a sweet boyfriend since I had seen her last. All of the sudden I noticed how beautiful her eyes and smile were. I could see her smooth and perfect skin.
It was crazy how fast she changed in front of my eyes as she talked about this love of hers.
In my own life, after my divorce I lost some weight, grew my hair out, and tried to dress a little spiffier. In these ways, I gained some attractiveness. But honestly it wasn’t until I fell in love that people really began asking “what I was doing” to look so good.
Honestly, I think it was love and happiness. And it’s not just in the getting, it’s in the giving too. Love in and love out. That is powerful beauty treatment.
Love comes in many forms and I don’t think you can have too much. My children and grandchildren fill me with the feeling of love. Working with students fills me with love. My friends are part of my loving circle.
Choose to be Beautiful
I’ve felt ugly and I’ve felt beautiful. Feeling beautiful is way more pleasant. Beauty truly does come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. In fact, the diversity of beauty is beautiful in itself. We have all known women that were technically “beautiful” yet something was missing.
That missing components are things such as passion, kindness, gratitude, and love. (See more ways to be beautiful for free!)
Combine a beautiful inside with some effort on the outside and you will soon feel beautiful yourself. Some of us concentrate on the inside stuff but ignore the outer part. Some of us concentrate on our outer wrapping and skimp on the inner work.
Do both! It’s the best combination and it will keep you ageless in your beauty. Now here are pictures from my teens, twenties, and now (age 55)
Now for my playlist…
I created a playlist that I could listen to daily to help create an inner belief that I was beautiful. As a bonus, it’s fun to hear song after song telling you that you are beautiful! Wow, all these people are singing to me?
Sara’s Be Beautiful Playlist
- We’re Young and Beautiful–Carrie Underwood
- You are So Beautiful—Joe Cocker
- Brave, Honest, Beautiful—Fifth Harmony (MY personal FAVE!)
- What Makes You Beautiful—One Direction
- Beautiful—Christina Aguilera
- Beautiful—Carole King
- Beautiful—Enrique Iglesias
- Beneath Your Beautiful—Labrinth
- Beautiful—Wayne Brady
- Good Morning Beautiful—Steve Holy
- Lovely—Sara Haze
- Beautiful to Me—Olly Murs
- You’re Beautiful—James Blunt
- Her Own Kind of Beautiful—Chris Lane\
- Forever Young—Joan Baez
Stay beautiful my friends!
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Hi, I'm Sara and I'm so happy you're here! My Think Big Life began shortly after I turned 50. Big changes can happen with a small start, an adjustment of thought, or a simple process. Over time, you transform your life into the one you always dreamed of having.